Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Week 12: L = Love

Moving on...to week 12 in Love Kate's A-Z All About Me Challenge.  As I've said before, I'm truly enjoying this challenge.  It's challenging me to get to know myself better in the process.  I'm digging deeper into me and what makes me tick than I have in a VERY long time.  I'm contemplating things that I've buried away for later reflection...and then conveniently forgot about.  Well, it's later...a long time later.

There are so many different kinds of love.  There is the love that I feel for my children.  There is the love that I feel for my parents.  The love I feel for my siblings.  The love I feel for my friends.  The love I feel for this blog and my readers. The love I feel for a favorite book, movie, song or band....sports, smells, places, sounds, etc.

I have spent the last 9 years healing from the destructive love I felt for my ex-husband.  The last time I gave that part of my heart to someone, it was trampled into pieces.  I glued those pieces back together a long time ago...and then built big strong walls around it to protect it from being shattered again.

Although I'm jaded and VERY scared of this kind of love, I think I might be ready to give it a shot...or at least think about giving it a shot.  Over the past 9 years I've learned that I don't have to give anyone my whole heart.  I won't let any one person be responsible for all of my love ever again.  It will not rule my world.  It will not make or break me as a mom, friend, daughter or sister.  I'm still gonna be me.

I've also spent a lot of time thinking about what I think are important qualities that the next person I give a piece of my heart to should possess.  First and foremost, he better love and respect his mama...but not be a mama's boy.  There's the obvious ones, like a job, a vehicle, a sense of humor, manners and a brain.  But he's also gotta have patience, a voter's registration card & good character.  He's gotta be comfortable with the fact that some of my best friends are guys.  He's gotta be trustworthy and trusting.  He's gotta be a little bit crazy...and little bit sane to even me out.  And he has to understand that he'll always come 2nd to my girls.  He'll have to woo my friends too. 

The list of things that will get someone pink slipped is a little shorter.  I don't do jealousy.  I've been there, done that and burned the t-shirt.  I won't tolerate lying.  I won't crawl up your ass, so don't crawl up mine.   Say what you mean and do what you say.  I'm too old for games.  I think that sums it up.  I don't think I'm asking too much.  Do you?

To be clear though, I'm not ready to start trolling the bars lookin for a sugar daddy.  I'm not registering at every online dating site.  Hell, I'm not looking for anything.  All I'm saying is I'm open to the idea of someone coming into my life.  If it happens great...if not, that's fine too. I'm happy exactly where I'm at.

PS: Facebook, Twitter and topmommyblogs.com (Sorry...I'm getting lazy and running out of catchy ways to primp myself out)



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3 comments:

  1. Oh I think I could love this closer examination of love. =)

    Aloha,
    Following ya now and forever from the GFC Hop. If you'd please... I'd love it if you'd join me for the ride at localsugarhawaii.com.

    xo,
    Nicole

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  2. I am glad you are happy. You're a strong woman.

    PS- I knwo you aren't trolling all the online sites but if you want a laugh grab a bottle of wine or tequila your BFFs and check out "just for farmers" You will laugh until you pee. Promise. And the more Booze the better it gets!

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  3. It's always best to be happy in yourself before you go looking for someone else, so I think you are going about this the right way.

    Good luck if you do find someone :)

    Sarah
    http://acatlikecuriosity.blogspot.co.uk/

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