Week 5: E = Entertaining

It's already week 4 in  Love Kate's A-Z All About Me challenge.  When she first invited me to join, I thought "What the hell?  Why not?  This will be easy peasy!!"  I thought wrong.  This is seriously a challenge for me.  I hadn't realized just how hard it is for me to actually write about myself...as opposed to my kids or friends or just my feelings in general.  This has really been making me dig deep and it's really been giving me "creative" anxiety....definitely not your elementary school writing assignment.  So here we go....


As a kid, I was shy.  I never wanted to be the center of attention.  You wanna talk about stage fright?  Put me at the front of the classroom for a presentation and I would full on freeze.  I suck at public speaking.  I hate walking into crowded rooms or restaurants by myself...just the thought gives me a mild anxiety attack. But amazingly enough, I'm not an anxious person.

Anyway, all of this being said, once I'm in my comfort zone, I thrive on ENTERTAINING those around me...even if it's at my own expense.  I've mastered the art of laughing at myself.  I don't embarrass easily...nor does my family.

Maybe that's why I've taken such an obsessive liking to blogging.  It's a platform that enables me to entertain a large number of people without actually having to get up on stage.  I'll go ahead and share a couple of entertaining moments (aka: moments I managed not to kill my kids).


1. Yesterday was bug the shit out of your sister day...who knew?  While I locked myself in my room to finish a phone conversation with Jennifay...Slou decided it would be a great idea to throw our poor 17 year old kitty at Beelay...while she was laying on the couch watching the Olympics.  


2. The other day I was "trying" to have my "turn" with my nephew, Squirt.  It's impossible to actually enjoy your time with him, when you've got his 2 cousins constantly invading your bubble and asking "Is it my turn yet?"....and one of them thinks she's his second mommy and knows more than ANY of us, when it comes to feeding, burping, soothing, etc.  I finally sent them upstairs!!  While I cuddled with Squirt and watched "The Big C" with my sister...we kept hearing screams, squeals, giggles and other "up to no good" sounds.  I tuned them out, because I knew they were only doing it to get a rise out of me.  Later, when I go upstairs for the night, I walk into my room and every.single.shoe.in.my.closet is strewn across my bedroom.  Then they both just play dumb when I ask about it.  LITTLE SHITS!!!!


3. Last week, I wrote this in one of my private groups...and now I can't exactly remember what even set me off in the first place...but I'm sure it was justified:

"I can't even describe the havoc that ensues when I go from complete heavy lidded relaxation...with sleep only seconds away to jumping out of my bed fighting the urge to slap my child in the face....whatever that feeling was intensified when she pushed me and told me she hated me. Lord give me the strength to not go rip her wet naked ass out of the shower by her hair and beat the ever living shit out of her. Bye bye restful sleep...hello rage!!!"

I hope you've found this to be at least a little bit entertaining...otherwise I've just wasted a whole lot of my writing mojo...and that alone makes me sad.  I'd love for you to follow me here or on Facebook here. Also, take a second of your time and click on the banner below to vote for me at topmommyblogs.com.  Happy hump day hookers...