Just Because....

I'm really a 14 year old girl, stuck in a 34 year old mom's body...doesn't mean I haven't grown up into a strong independent self-respecting adult.  It just means that I tend to have a hard time with the "if you can't say anything nice" rule, I have a potty mouth and a really twisted sense of humor.

Today is one of those days where I'm having a really hard time saying something nice about several situations.  So what do I do?  I blog...duh!!  Of course one of my better qualities is that I really don't like to hurt anyone's feelings...you can see how that tends to conflict with the saying of not-nice things.  So I'll go ahead and start with...if anything in this post hurts your feelings, I'm sorry.  Everything I'm about to say is out of love and other things (like frustration, disappointment & experience).

Nobody is perfect.  I understand that!!  Really, I do.  But there is a difference between an oops and a FUCK UP!!  The number of reasonable times you can forgive the same oops is way higher than the same FUCK UP!!!  "Oops, I forgot to put the toilet seat down."...gets old quick, if you prefer to keep your ass dry when you're up for a midnight pee.   "CRAP,  I forgot to pay the phone bill this month."....can be overlooked so many times.  "DAMN, Officer I swear I thought the speed limit was 90." adds up pretty quick.  "SHIT, I forgot to turn the stove off and the house burned down."  could definitely take a while to get over.  But "FUCK, that wasn't you I went home with last night?" or "FUCK, I gave you the herp?" or "FUCK, you weren't supposed to see that." aren't forgive and forget offenses.  

I used to give people the benefit of "everyone has to get to their breaking point in their own time".  But as we all get older and grow up, we all know the difference between right and wrong.  We know the difference between good and bad.  Every single person is responsible for their own situations.  Sure there are always going to be unforeseen speed bumps along the way.  You can't control anyone but yourself...and how you react to others bad choices that affect you.  For example; if you loan someone money and they never pay you back.  Are you going to continue to loan them money?  HELL NO!!  You decide whether you're going to be a door mat or not...not the person wiping their feet.

Everyone is so quick to say "don't judge someone until you've walked a mile in their shoes."...but those shoes are worn by feet that are controlled by a person that chooses which roads they travel down.  I've done a lot of walking in my 34 years and sure I've gotten lost a time or two, but I remember which turns took me into the "hood and which ones took me out.  Being strong is a choice!!  You either want to man-up and create your own happiness or you don't.  It's that simple.

I'm no longer the patient person I was in my 20's.  Most of my "give a damn" busted a long time ago.  I'll be your biggest cheerleader if you're doing everything in your power to learn from your mistakes and change direction, but I don't do drama.  If you're not serious about putting yourself first, I'm not gonna sit around to be made to feel like a fool for encouraging you and holding you up and defending you, while you continue to ride your roller coaster.
 
It doesn't mean I love any of you any less.  It just means that my self-respect is gonna come before your self-induced train wreck.  I've been burned way too many times trying to be the friend that saves everyone.  I can't save anyone but myself.  I live my life surrounded by people that don't need saving or building up very often.  We all hold each other up...and for that I am so grateful.  When making a hard decision, stand back for a minute and think about what you would tell yourself if you were on the outside looking in.  Or better yet, think about what you would say behind your back if you were watching from the outside.  

Now that I've gotten all of that off my chest, I feel a little lighter and may even have some nice things to say after all.  This therapy we call blogging really does help.  If you've enjoyed this post, please click the banner below to cast your vote for me on topmommyblogs.com and follow me either here through GFC or on Facebook. Feel free to spread my words of wisdom to any or all of your friends....I'm trying to get famous here ya know!!!  Thank you and have an AWESOME weekend!!!