My birthday was last Tuesday. On my birthday, I ALWAYS wake up thinking of my friend Terri. She was one of those friends that was there for you whenever you needed her and knew exactly what to say when you needed advice. She was ALWAYS the first person to call me on my birthday...ALWAYS!! God, took her from us 5 1/2 years ago. Not a day goes by that I don't think of her and wish I could pick up the phone and call her. This isn't about being sad. This is to remind us all that nobody is promised tomorrow!! Make sure your friends and family know you love them. Be a friend you'd like to have.
My birthday seems to be as good a day as any to take a step back and assess my relationships. Appreciate the ones that build me up. Walk away from the ones that tear me down. Make sure I'm being the friend that my friends deserve to have...and distance myself from the ones that are one sided. These are my Rules of Friendship Etiquette:
1. Be honest - If your friend has hurt your feelings, talk to them about it!! Don't let it fester and talk to EVERYONE but them about it. Part of being a great friend is being honest with each other. True friends don't always sugar coat the hard to swallow stuff...and they have also have to be able to listen to the things they may not want to hear.
2. Be reliable - If you commit to doing something...DO IT!! If something comes up, just say so. Don't just NOT show up or call.
3. Be prompt - If you make plans with someone for a certain time, be on time!! It's RUDE and INCONSIDERATE to make people wait for you. Their time is just as important as yours and your procrastination and tardiness says that you really don't care about their time.
4. Be available - If you're constantly turning down invites to hang out with your friends, eventually the invites will stop coming. Everyone has busy lives, but if you're not willing to make time to spend with those that are important to you...then they must not be that important to you.
5. Don't be a SINGLE-ONLY friend. When you start dating someone, don't just crawl up their ass and disappear...only to show your face again when there are problems and you need a shoulder to cry on.
6. Don't be an only when you need something friend. Don't just call someone when you need something. Call them just to check on them, to see how they're doing. Friendship is a 2-way street. Make sure you're looking both ways. Think about your friendships. Think about who you depend and lean on the most...can they say you're as supportive of them as they are of you? I've witnessed and experienced both sides of these relationships. We've all been guilty of it...but recognize it and do something about it.
7. Be your friend's biggest fan and cheerleader!! Let them know when you're proud of them. Tell them when they look nice. Encourage them to make the right choices in their lives. Often times friends can see more from the outside looking in, than you can up close and personal.
8. Be loyal - If someone is your friend, you don't talk about them behind their back. You stick up for them when you do hear someone talking bad about them. You don't date each others exes either!!
9. Don't be a doormat. Don't be the friend that everyone relies on, but when you need someone...nobody is around for you. Express your opinions and be yourself. You're allowed to tell someone no when they ask you for a favor. Don't allow yourself to be used!!
10. Have fun!! If you and your friends don't laugh til you cry, snot or pee yourself...then there is something wrong!!!
I can honestly say that I have AMAZING friends!! They help me be a better mom and person in general. They encourage me and support me. They make me feel special on my birthday!! I love you all!!
And here are MY one birthday rule for FOREVER:
1. My children aren't allowed to speak...other than to say Happy Birthday, yes ma'am, please and thank you or I LOVE YOU!!